Mary goes up to the Father after his Sunday morning service, and she’s in tears. He says, “So what’s bothering you, dear?” She says, “Oh, Father, I’ve got terrible news.
Casey came home from the doctor looking very worried. His wife said, “What’s the problem?” He said, “The doctor told me I have to take a pill every day for
A man had six children and was very proud of his achievement. He was so proud of himself that he started calling his wife, “Mother of Six”, in spite of
One day, the chemistry teacher asked his students, “What is the chemical formula for water?” Suzie immediately raised her hand. “Yes, Suzie, what’s the answer?”, the teacher asked. Suzie answered
A man gathered all of his children together and said: “Children, when George Washington knocked down the cherry tree, he told his father honestly that it was him, now answer
The newlywed wife said to her husband when he returned from work, “I have great news for you. Pretty soon, we’re going to be three in this house instead of
John asks his wife, Mary, what she wants to celebrate their 40th wedding anniversary. “Would you like a new designer bag?” he asks. “Not really,” says Mary. “Well how about
A woman was sitting in the waiting room for her first appointment with a new dentist. She noticed his BDS diploma on the wall, which bore his full name. Suddenly,
A professor was giving a big test one day. He handed out all of the tests and went back to his desk to wait. Once the test was over, the
A boss was complaining in a staff meeting one day that he wasn’t getting any respect. Later that morning he went to a local sign shop and bought a small
Having past almost 30 years, the same question still bothers him… Why he does not look alike his siblings and parents at all. So he summoned all his courage and
Julia tells her husband. “James, that young couple that just moved in next door seems such a loving couple. Every morning, when he leaves the house, he kisses her goodbye.
A tourist on a farm asked the farmer why one pig had a wooden leg. The farmer said, “That pig is the bravest pig ever saw.” “So why does he
Jim, Scott and Alex are tired after traveling all day and check into a hotel. When they get to reception, they find out they’ll have to walk 75 flights of
The lawyer’s son wanted to follow in his father’s footsteps, so he went to law school. He graduated with honors, and then went home to join his father’s firm. At the
“Mom, Dad, site down. I have something very important to tell you,” Said Emma, upon her return home from college after graduation. “I met a guy who lives near the
A solicitor for the Red Cross called upon a young couple for a donation. Hearing a commotion inside, he knocked extra-loudly on the door. A disheveled man answered the door.
Two men took a long safari vacation in the African. One day, needing a rest, they removed their packs and leaned their rifles against a tree. They were startled when
Sally walked in the dentist office to make an appointment. “How much do you charge to pull out a tooth?” she asked. “It’s $130”, was the prompt reply. “$130?”, gasped
A man stormed up to the front desk of the library and said: “I have a complaint!” “Yes, sir?” said the librarian looking up at her. “I borrowed a book
A lawyer was filling out a job application when he came to the question, “Have you ever been arrested?” He answered, “No.” The next question, intended for people who had
One day a man spotted a lamp by the roadside. He picked it up, rubbed it vigorously and genie appeared. “I’ll grant you your fondest wish,” the genie said. The
Two small boys met the first time in school. “My name is Billy. What’s yours?” asked the first boy. “Tommy,” replied the second. “My daddy’s an accountant. What does your
If you feel lonely when you are alone… Then you can turn off the light, switch on the TV and watch a ghosts movie. After a while, you will feel
An old married couple is sitting on the couch watching TV. On the show, they were speaking about how to prepare in case of death, etc. “Honey,” says the husband,
John was in an accident and his face was badly burned. The doctors couldn’t reconstruct his face with John’s own skin because he was so skinny. His wife said they
Three men are sitting on a beach talking about how they all ended up there. The first man says, “I ran a superstore out in California, but business got bad.
A wealthy man is driving down the road in his limo when he sees two men eating grass on the side of the road. He pulls over to investigate. He
A guy took his girlfriend to her first football game. They had great seats right behind their team’s bench. After the game, he asked her how she like the experience.
A woman gets on a bus with her baby. The bus driver says, “That’s the ugliest baby that I’ve ever seen. Ugh!” The woman goes to the rear of the