“Mom, can I have an animal cracker?” asked 3-year-old Bob. “Sure Bob,” said his mom. “Open up the box, and take a few.” Forty-five minutes later Bob’s mother walked into the kitchen.
Joe had just received his brand new driver’s license. He is going to take them for a ride for the first time. So, the family troops out to the driveway and
A man is visiting Australia. The man at customs asks him, “Do you have a criminal record?” The man replies, “I didn’t think you’d need one to get into Australia anymore.”
A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him on the back of the head with a frying pan. He asks, “What was that for?”
There are two guys who have been lost in the desert for weeks, and they’re at death’s door. As they stumble on, hoping for salvation in the form of an oasis
Brian had asked Dave to help him out with cutting his rather large garden hedge after work, so Dave went straight over to Brian’s home. When they got to the
Husband calls up hotel management from the room. The husband said, “Please come fast, I am having an argument with my wife and she says she will jump from your
Friend #1, “Are you visiting us tomorrow? Do you need directions?” Friend #2, “I’m all set. I have the address, a GPS and a GPS override.” Friend #1, “What’s a
A woman called our airline customer service desk asking if she could take her dog on board. “Sure,” The customer service representative said, “as long as you provide your own
23 A couple is sitting in their living room and sipping wine. Out of the blue, the wife says, “I love you.” “Is that you or the wine talking?” asks
A policeman pulls a truck over and says to the driver, “You can’t drive around with badgers in this town! Take them to the zoo immediately.” The driver says, “Okay.” Then
The doctor tells his patient: “Well, I have good news and bad news.” The patient says: “Lay it on me, Doc. What’s the bad news?” The doctor: “You have Alzheimer’s disease.” The
The contractor wanted to give the government official a sports car. The official objected, saying: “Sir, common decency and my basic sense of honor would never permit me to accept
There was a father who called his five small children together. As the sat together in a circle on the floor, the dad placed a toy in the middle. He
A man comes to the entrance of Heaven and God tells him, “You haven’t done anything good, but you haven’t done anything bad either. If you can tell me of something amazing
Joe asked God: “How much is a penny worth in heaven?” God replied: “$1 million.” Joe asked: “How long is a minute in heaven?” God said: “One million years.” Joe asked for a penny.
Two coworkers were talking by the water fountain. One guy said, “Today I got through the first step of getting divorced.” The second guy replies, “Oh, did you go to Mr. Guggenheim?
A man walks into a Swiss bank. The bank is very full so it takes a long time for it to be his turn. After an hour wait, he finally gets to
KA university student wanted to sit next to one of his teachers at lunch. However, the teacher looked at the student with an arrogant face and said, ‘A swan shan’t be
“Has your son decided what he wants to be when he grows up?” 1I asked my friend. “He wants to be a garbage man,” he replied. “That’s an unusual ambition
History August 16 is the National Tale A Joke Day! Yes, this is a real holiday! With our intensive research, we can not find out who is the creator or origin of
Man, “What you have prepared to eat today?” Wife, “Nothing.” Man, “But you did nothing yesterday.” Wife, “I made it for two days.” Man, “What you were doing today?” Man,
A Hunter walking through the jungle found a huge dead elephant with a pigmy standing beside it. Amazed, he asked: “Did you kill that?” “Yes,” the pigmy said. Then the hunter
A woman walked into the kitchen and found her husband walking around with a fly swatter. “What are you doing?” the woman asked. “Hunting mosquitoes” He responded. “Oh, catching any?”
The character designs of The Simpsons are so iconic. Even they are reduced to their color schemes, but they are still easily recognizable.
Coffee bean are not beans, instead they are berry pits. Even though the coffee beans are seeds, they are referred to as “beans” because of they looks like beans. Source: Wikipedia – https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coffee_bean
A rabbit escaped from a research laboratory where he had lived since birth. He joined a group of wild rabbits and lived their lives for a day. He fed on
I had a terrible breakup. My friends told me that if I want to get over my ex-girlfriend, I should get rid of anything that reminded me of her. So what
A woman sued a man for defamation of character. She charged that he had called her a pig. As a result, the man was found guilty and fined. After the
Mama Raptor and Papa Raptor were in court getting a divorce and the judge offered Baby Raptor a choice of which parent to live with. Judge: “Do you want to live with